KOTHAMANGALAM [5.30PM IST, 4TH JULY 2009] : As I drove out of the BAR parking lot the vehicle right in front of me was a POLICE jeep out on rounds. I was trailing behind the same for quite a while, unworried and going with the lyrics of the song that was playing. The trailing, however, never seemed to end as there was no opportunity to overtake it and it was kinda dull as speeds were below average, like a slow race. Then finally, the trail paced up, and i saw my window of opportunity to overtake the vehicle. All this while, I had an exuberant feeling that it would be fun to be stopped by the police as I knew, I wasn't drunk, and wondered how that situation would be.
As I came round the corner, the location was where the POLICE usually parked to check on vehicles and I thought to my self that, I'd just skip them as they stopped and took places. But, guess what, today was my lucky day. My feeling was about to become reality. The driver of the jeep signaling with his hand. I was uncertain if he was signaling to me, so I slowed down and as I overtook him, it became certain that his actions were for me to stop and so I did.
Picture this, a guys gets out of his car, an Indica with a broken side mirror. He's 5' 9", dressed in a shabby red shirt and jeans, curled messy hair which looks streaked bronze and a goatee like he was some freak out of a rock concert. Imagine yourself as the police officer and me the above victim. Whats going through your mind? I'll tell you, a smirk on your face and the thought "look what we have here!".
I walked to the officer in the passenger seat and there commenced a hilarious situation I would rather have laughed at than been in. The officer asked the obvious question, "Have you had anything?" and I knew that question was coming to me. I was cool within and told him that I hadn't and that I have not had a drink my entire life. Yea, like he believed me. But the constable was the wacky one. He looked at me and asked if I minded to give a blow so that he could trace any scent of alcohol. I casually agreed. He takes out the receiver of his intercom, shows it to me and asks me to blow into it. Guess what went through my mind? I was laughing within and saying to myself, "You gotta be kidding me!!" accompanied by an odd grin. But that look on his face was as serious as ever.
There I am on a cloudy day, beside a POLICE jeep, asked to blow into a receiver of a intercom which has MOTOROLA printed on it. Still staring at the MOTOROLA print, I give a quick glance to the constable's face. His look was perpetual and I realised that I still had to blow into the receiver. How WEIRD ! I was so amused by the situation that I don't know how I managed not to laugh. I lean towards the receiver to blow, and as I did so, the constable brings his nose lower to catch the breath. Again, how WEIRD! I give him a good blow and then, the idiot comes to his senses that I was telling the truth.
This was followed by a question answer session, as they were not happy about their catch and they didn't want to make a fool of themselves, which they already managed to do. They asked for my papers and tried to find something out of place to frame me, like they usually do. And then the smart constable starts to speak, "We'll right him up for the broken rear view mirror". "You gotta be kidding me!!", I thought to myself and went to get my papers. I was unsure if i had them at that point, as i walked to get them. Fortunately, I had my papers, but my pollution papers had expired a month back. By now, I was like "what ever !!".
They gave me the fine slip and hinted to drop by at the station tomorrow and that they'd reduce the amount if I payed tomorrow. I nodded and walked to my car grinning and saying to myself, " You can dream about seeing me at the station tomorrow, filthy buggers!!".
14 years ago